Sheila threw all of Bud’s shirts out of the third story window. He stood outside looking up, a shirt draped over half his head.

“Are you upset?” Bud shouted up to the window.

“Take it, Bud. I never want to see you again.” Sheila replied, wiping tears from her face.

“You didn’t answer my question…”

 

 

Bud collected his shirts and walked away. Over the thirteen years they were together, it wasn’t the first time she caught him in the honey jar with his bare hands, but it would be the last. That was her honey. She couldn’t have that.

Covered in sticky gold, Bud went to the closest place to get cleaned up. His brother Benson was, as always, in his parents’ basement just up the street.

 

“Hey Benson… Sheila kicked me out for good.” Bud dropped his large ball of clothes on the ground.

“Whoa man. That’s…” Benson closed his eyes in extremely deep thought, looking for the right words to say to his brother in his time of need. Would he be the one to cheer Bud up and get him back on his feet? He considered giving helpful advice to guide Bud towards a happy life with or without Sheila. His brother looked at him, awaiting his sentence to be completed. Benson opened an eye and peeked, but pretended he didn’t when Bud noticed. He went back to wondering how to proceed. It began to dawn on him that he had never been in a relationship himself. It was difficult to find a partner in the basement. Back to the sentence, he thought, he stalled enough. Then he thought about the nature of words and ambiguity. He needed to be as clear as possible so that Bud didn’t get the wrong idea. He was ready. Benson had the perfect conclusion to his sentence after much deliberation. “...bad.”

Bud was frustrated but appreciated his brother’s kind words. He paced the basement floor in deep thought. All the times he shared his own honey with Sheila and now she won’t do the same? He became furious. He realized he was now on the market of love. In rage, the old punching bag hanging from the ceiling received a right hook. BAM. It flew across the room.

 

Benson turned from the TV and glared at his brother with as much intrigue as he could muster. Not only had Bud somehow blasted the punching bag across the room with his bare hands, he was also levitating and glowing. It took him a few moments to focus and return to normal.

“Hey, do that again, bro.” Benson requested.

With ease, Bud did it again. “You’re floaty….. and …. glowy.”  Benson exclaimed.

At the door, Sheila opened and leaned on the frame. She somehow completely ignored the glowing and floating.

“Come back, Bud… I overreacted.”

“Hey, Bud, look, it’s Sheila.” Benson informed his brother.

“Really?” Bud responded to Sheila.

“Really... what do ya say?”

“I say, let’s go home.”

Upon speaking those words, Bud’s glow faded and he fell to the ground. It was clear what needed to be done. He backed away and sat on the couch next to Benson.

“Aren’t you coming?” Sheila questioned, confusion spreading across her face.

“Nah.” Bud answered.

His refusal gave him the glow back and the couch floated. Benson was asleep by this point. Sheila buzzed off in a huff and Bud knew who he had to be to maintain his power. He would be on the market of love indefinitely, as he was now Bachelor Bear.

 

Honk directed a one-night circus in Big City Park which was wildly successful. The event ended around midnight, so he began to pack up. While he collected all the props and dismantled equipment, he kept hearing a strange belching sound just outside the tent. Each time it got louder and more messy. Honk took down the tentpoles and it revealed to him the heavily impaired bear with honey dripping out of its mouth.

“Just leave me. BURRP.” Bachelor Bear requested, though there was no indication anyone was going to help him. “LEAVE!!”

A balloon began to inflate just above the bear on the park bench. With a swift move of the hands, Honk turned it into an exact replica of Bachelor Bear, complete with glasses and all. He smiled and handed it to Bach, but the bear just rolled over and groaned.

“Impressive, but a balloon can’t mend a broken heart.” he whined.

Honk held a hand to his chin and decided he was more invested in this than cleaning up the circus. He pointed a finger in the air as if he had an idea. From a ridiculously tiny briefcase, he pulled out a ton of balloons and tied them to Bachelor Bear’s waist. Bach just let it carry him as Honk himself took hold of some himself and they flew towards the downtown area.

“Please just let me mope.” Bachelor Bear pouted.

Honk slowly began to pop the balloons carrying the two of them so they could have a soft landing. They were in front of Club Juicy, where Bachelor Bear could be found most nights. Honk slapped Bach with a fish on each cheek. Bach glowed as if ready to fight, but the glow faded as even his Bachelor Presence couldn’t overcome his mood. Honk held open the door to the club and the two of them took seats at the bar as the nightclub was bumping.

The clown tapped Bachelor Bear and pointed to a woman a couple seats down. He mimed a conversation with his hands and pointed again, guiding the bear to speak to the woman.

“Hello, I’m Bud. What’s your name?” Bach weakly introduced himself. The woman completely ignored him. Honk grabbed his paw and gave a firm ‘no’ with his arms. He then slicked back his hair and smiled handsomely, showing Bud how to approach.

“Excuse me. You look like my mom.” Bach tried again. Honk put a sack over his head and dragged him out of the club.

A master of non-verbal communication, Honk was ready to whip out the big guns to convey to Bachelor Bear what he needed to. Before he was able to reach into the briefcase, a beautiful woman approached him from the street.

“If you’re coming into the club, we should dance.” she said, then entered the club.

Honk held up a finger to tell Bachelor Bear to wait while he began to head inside to dance with the pretty lady.

“Where are you going?” the bear said, looking up the ground.

Honk danced in response.

“She invited me to dance. Not you.” Bachelor Bear said, dead serious, as if he wasn’t just laying on the sidewalk on his back, covered in honey and the woman clearly spoke directly to Honk.

Honk laughed at Bach and walked inside the club. The woman was at the center of the dance floor, looking right at him. He danced over, but was grabbed from behind. Bachelor Bear was glowing bright and he swung Honk with one arm over to the corner of the room. As he began to dance with the woman, his glow dimmed until it was gone. Honk had an opening. He squirted the dance floor with a fake flower, causing everyone to slip. Bachelor Bear looked back at him.

“She doesn’t want you, clown. She wants to care for the bear.” he spoke in third person, causing anyone in earshot to cringe. The woman stood up and returned to dancing, however.

“Guys. You can both dance with me.” she said.

Honk was not too happy to share, but he moved in and the three danced until the club was otherwise empty.

“What’s your name?” Bachelor Bear asked her.

Instead of an answer, the woman screeched in many voices. The dance floor became warm beneath their feet. The skin upon her face peeled off, the clothes tore. There was something else beneath them, some kind of chitin exoskeleton. It was the top section of an otherworldly beast, primed to devour the two heroes.

“You can have her.” Bach told Honk.

The club owner, Ryan Flyer walked out in a white robe, his hands covered in blood.

“That’s right, bear.” he said as the beast descended into the floor and Bach’s glow came back on. “How many times have I banned you from Club Juicy. You come back another time, I’m summoning that thing for real.”

“Ry guy, what are you talking about!?.”

“Stop calling me Ry guy. It’s the worst possible nickname.”

“Big Ry?”

“No. Stop.”

“You really don’t want me to come back?”

“Please.” Ryan said. Bachelor Bear hung his head and began to walk out.

Honk walked up to Mr. Flyer and pulled out of his briefcase an envelope that said “Circus Money”. He handed it to the man and pointed at the sign.

“You want to buy Club Juicy?” Ryan asked. Honk nodded. He quickly counted the money and his eyes widened. “Yep. All yours.” He had Honk sign some papers and fled the building.

“How much did you pay?” Bachelor Bear asked. Honk shrugged. “So we own this place now.”

Honk shook his head violently at Bachelor Bear, who pretended not to see him as he walked around the club eyeing all the changes he planned to make.